The best funny birthday sayings that are sure to make you laugh.

• I hope you celebrate your birthday the way you came into this world. Naked and screaming.
• When I have a birthday, I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.
• Please don’t be mad as I didn’t get you a gift. At your age, it sort of depends.
• Inside every older person is a younger person, wondering what the hell happened.
• The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
• You know you’re getting old when the only thing you want for your birthday is not to be reminded of it.
• Age is just a number and mine is unlisted.
• Middle age is when you still believe you’ll feel better in the morning.
• Congratulations! You only look one year older than you did on your last birthday.
• If things get better with age, then you’re approaching outstanding.
• You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
• Congrats on reaching an age that makes your receding hairline seem appropriate.
• Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional.
• Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
• Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
• Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
• You’re how old? Oh man, that’s like dead in dog years.
• I didn’t forget your birthday, I just forgot today’s date!
• Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
• Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you’ve got to start young.
• Wrinkles are the service stripes of life.
• Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
• After seeing all the candles on your cake, I seriously hope that you topped off your fire insurance.
• I was gonna give you something awesome for your birthday, but the mailman made me get out of the mailbox.
• Birthdays are like buses, never the number you want.
• The Best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
• Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
• Birthdays are like boogers. The more you have, the harder it is to breathe!
• Congratulations on being born a really long time ago.
• If you want to look young and thin on your birthday., hang around a bunch of old fat people.
• Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
• So far, this is the oldest you have ever been.
• Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you have not committed.
• You know you are getting old when you walk around puddles instead of through them.
• I intend to live forever, so far, so good!

Feel free to share your funny birthday sayings in the comments section.